Art projects

I am super excited. I have like 20 different art project ideas- and the best part? I need Candice as my model. It's a photography/mixed media project and I am very excited about it. I can't wait to take pictures of my beautiful girlfriend. 

Hopefully we can take the pictures in the next week. Or the week after. 

We are going to disneyland and west Hollywood. Maybe when we go out that will be a good time to get the pictures. 

But more than anything- I am looking forward to spending time with her. We were hoping to go out on yesterday- but logistics of the day and the doctors appointments made it not possible. :( 

Soon. I want & need to see her soon :)

OH SNAP!

I'm Back! HA! It's been years... literally.

I was just talking with Camerin about how i need to blog on here more often. We have been talking about Candice and trying to figure out making more time for her. Camerin sometimes needs my encouragement- and i haven't been doing that.

Our lives have been ridiculously consumed with trying to get pregnant. and before that we were consumed with work, life and everything else. It's not right and it's not ok.

Candice is important to me. Important to us. I used to do a really good job of showing that support. Of pushing her to go out. I haven't been doing that. I would ask for dates with her, ask for fun time with her. I haven't done that. Maybe thats what has been missing.

There has been this feeling of something missing in our relationship. I am not unhappy at all. But something feels like its gone... and i think it's Candice.

We went out for pride a couple weeks ago- which was amazing. I want to go out again. ASAP.

 

Don't we look happy? it felt so good. 

its been a long time

since me and candice went out. this weekend is rainbow festival and i think we are going to try and make it out for it. i need to see her.

we recently talked a lot about the lack of Candice, and what not. we have both agreed that we need to make more time to go out. and more time to do the things we love. and the things that make us happy.

I am really excited to start seeing her more again. i miss her beautiful face so much.

recent thoughts and what nots

just been thinking lately. Missing Candice a lot. I feel awful that we don't go out like we used to, and that i now only see Candice once ever couple months. We haven't been out since Halloween, and i feel responsible. I know that it's not really my decision, but sometimes i am just not in the mood to go to the clubs, or the bar, and i feel bad about that. i miss Candice a lot, and really would like a date night with her soon, maybe even one where we stay in, and i can cook her dinner... followed by drinks and dancing. Something. We need time together soon- and i know she feels it too.

Halloween!

Halloween is and always has been my favorite Holiday. This year my Halloween was more stressful and crazier than usual. I spent the week leading up to Halloween working 10-12 hour days- and by the time Halloween was here- it was my 7th day in a row working. I pretty much worked right through my favorite holiday- but there was one awesome night, that made it all worth it. Candice and I attended the Exotic Halloween Ball, and had a great time. Words cannot describe how excited i was to see my girlfriend- it had been at least 2 months since we had gone out. of course, she looked just as beautiful as ever, even more beautiful than i had remembered. Reminded me again, how important it is for us to go out together. i am hoping we can start going out more again- i don't think i can survive another 2 months without her. Look how beautiful she looked!

Dancing and Drinks

I got dancing and drinks on my mind...with my beautiful girlfriend. Hopefully we can carve out some time soon to make those things happen. it's been way too long- life is too busy. i think we both desperately need a fun night out. and if time doesn't allow for that, at least some time at home.... i miss her more then i think she realizes... :)

it's been awhile

and i miss my girlfriend...a lot... it's been a long time since me and Candice went out. It's been a long time since i have blogged as well...probably because of the lack of us going out. Things have been a little hectic. New jobs and planning a wedding tend to take up a lot of time. but i miss her. a lot. and i miss us. and our time together... sometimes i feel guilty, like maybe i make candice go away, or make cameron not want to be candice...because i get needy, and whiney sometimes. and to be honest...sometimes i get scared. Sometimes i feel like i am holding Cameron back from really truly being who he wants to be, and who he is. Sometimes i feel that Cameron does want to be Candice full time, and as much as i am okay with that, and would here no matter what- i feel like he never would do it, or admit it. It's definitely a unique situation- not something one usually has to think about- but to me, it's very real. I would be by Cameron's side no matter what- and i hope he truly knows that... because its who is that i am in love with.